Why do I have to Work HERE? (Sneak Peek into my upcoming Work Devotional)

Thought: We will fall in different situations, but despite the challenges, we have a God that wants to be our companion through it all.

 “…Be content with such things as ye have: for He hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.” Hebrews 13:5

Reading: 2 Kings 20: 14-18, Daniel 1: 1-4

Why do I have to work here?” This is a question that most of us ask when we don’t like our jobs or employment situation. “Why can’t I be like the other people that seem successful and joyful? Why is it that I have to struggle so much?” The answers to these questions most times lie in our past. Sometimes we look at individuals that we deem to be successful, but we have not a clue to how they got where they are. Some individuals were born into riches, that is, they benefit from the work put in by their forefathers, and others are reaping directly from what they themselves have sowed. It is also important to not measure one’s success to that of others. What one individual might do to achieve success might be way less than what you have to do. So it’s best to focus on your own race.

There is also the situation of individuals suffering because of God’s judgement (Adam and by extension all of us). This was what happened in the case of Daniel also. Daniel himself wasn’t the cause of his situation for it was prophesized generations before his birth that they would be taken captive.

Prophesy:

 “Then came Isaiah the prophet unto king Hezekiah, and said unto him, What said these men? And from whence came they unto thee? And Hezekiah said, They are come from a far country, even from Babylon. And he said, What have they seen in thine house? And Hezekiah answered, All the things that are in mine house have they seen: there is nothing among my treasures that I have not shewed them. And Isaiah said unto Hezekiah, Hear the word of the Lord. Behold, the days come, that all that is in thine house, and that which thy fathers have laid up in store unto this day, shall be carried into Babylon: nothing shall be left, saith the Lord. And of thy sons that shall issue from thee, which thou shalt beget, shall they take away; and they shall be eunuchs in the palace of the king of Babylon.” 2 Kings: 20: 14-18

Fulfillment:

In the third year of the reign of Jehoiakim king of Judah came Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon unto Jerusalem, and besieged it. And the Lord gave Jehoiakim king of Judah into his hand, with part of the vessels of the house of God: which he carried into the land of Shinar to the house of his god; and he brought the vessels into the treasure house of his god. And the king spake unto Ashpenaz the master of his eunuchs, that he should bring certain of the children of Israel, and of the king’s seed, and of the princes; Children in whom was no blemish, but well favoured, and skilful in all wisdom, and cunning in knowledge, and understanding science, and such as had ability in them to stand in the king’s palace, and whom they might teach the learning and the tongue of the Chaldeans.” (Daniel 1:1-4)

From general sight it would appear that Daniel was dealt a bad hand. Can you imagine, a young man of royal lineage dragged away to serve another king? He was probably looking forward to being “fruitful and multiplying” only to find out he’ll be castrated into a eunuch. For many young men today that would be the most horrifying thing. Daniel’s manhood was taken away. He had to forget about having children. This had to be a painful experience both physically and emotionally. Then after being robbed of his manhood, he was then put to serve a heathen king that practiced idolatry. He had a rather sticky situation to deal with.

But what did Daniel do? Did he fold his hand and say I’m done? Did he turn his back on his God for allowing this? Did he try to sabotage his new master? NO! He served as unto God. Daniel didn’t allow the fate that he was dealt to make him anything less. We have to do the same. A very popular part of Jamaican culture is the sorrel drink during the Christmas season. In making the drink you’ll have to boil ginger and pour that hot ginger water over the picked sorrel in a container. This is usually left to sit overnight. Once the container is reopened the water becomes a reddish-crimson taking on the colour characteristics of the sorrel. We have to ensure that when we are placed in adverse situation (hot water) we don’t allow the situations to change us but we instead display our true godly character and infuse the situation with a testimony of our God.

To extract the fragrance from perfume a crushing process takes place. It is no different with us. When we are persecuted and we behave in a godly manner, a sweet smelling fragrance goes up to the Lord. So even though you might find yourself in a desperate situation that may or may not be any fault of yours, know that it is not the end of the road. Just serve and trust your God. We will fall in different situations, but despite the challenges, we have a God that wants to be our companion through it all.

Tip of the Day: Focus on those things about your job that you appreciate.

Check out more of what I write on Kerrykay Publications!

It’s not a want, IT’S A NEED!

 Though it is customary for all to think that all women live in Lala-land believing in a prince Charming or that we all yearn for “tall dark and handsome”- when you get to the core of us you find that- this is sometimes far from the truth.  Women come in many variations and are sometimes so diverse that it’s hard for men to understand us. But there is one language that when spoken correctly we all get it! It’s called love.

 This is most definitely not talking about a man that is being overly needy or jealous—its more about someone that goes above and beyond to love his woman on her terms not expecting anything in return.

Loving her on her terms shows her that you pay attention to her needs. Loving her on her terms could mean that you hold her hands when walking together just because she likes it.  It could be not holding her hand because that’s not her thing.  Either way, you must make her feel loved on her terms without making her feel like you are doing what you do because you are expecting her to do something in return. When men do things just for returned favors it puts them in a position to get used.  A man has to understand that that love void in a woman if filled creates an aim and desire to please him.

 The worst thing a man can do is threat the woman in his life like a second class citizen, even if it is not intentional. Many marriages break up because men work too many hours, or are too busy with other things. Even though she knows it’s to support the family not receiving that loving affection throws her off.  Many women get frustrated not receiving this love and are led to think that their significant other is unable of loving them as they ought.  This lack further derails the relationship as additional voids are highlighted and before you know it, two people that were once in love find themselves in nasty divorce battles.

 It doesn’t have to go that far. Let’s do what the Bible says: Eph. 5:22-27: Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.

My Conversation with Society 2 Weeks Before My 30th Birthday

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Society: Well hello there. It’s drawing near…

 Me: Hey

Society: How are you feeling?

Me: Just wonderful I tell ya, great things are happening in my life.

Society: Great things? You’re single! Your biological clock is ticking so you better hurry up.

Me:  Huh?

Society: Girl don’t you know you can’t hug your degree or your career?

Me: Seriously, who goes to school to hug a degree? Are you trying to tell me that the men of today don’t appreciate strong, intelligent women? Why should I have to choose between a family and an education/Career?

Society: It doesn’t look good. The ideal is for a woman to establish her home and family by age thirty. If you start now you can make it before you turn thirty one.

Me: Just what are you trying to say? Just grab any old body?

Society: An apple is apple. It doesn’t really matter. Choice is overrated when you are lonely.

Me: I can understand your point on loneliness; no one wants to be alone.  I don’t want to be alone. Now Society, you listen, I have absolutely no intention of adding to the already high divorce rates that saturate your existence. My reason for getting married will never be to fit in your little box. It will be to someone I love that also loves me, for me.

Society: hahaha , you are going to be an emotional wreck, you wait and see. After that you’ll become a hard unhappy stone that will make the life of everyone around you miserable.

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Me: Society if that’s how you feel about me I’m withdrawing my membership from you. Your definition for a good life is wrong and only seeks to please eyes and the status quo. I’m choosing to be defined by what the word of God says. The man that finds me will find a good thing. I won’t be desperate, I’ll be wise in waiting. Trusting God’s direction and instructions  to my true love.  I will “Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen my heart.

A Little Advice:

Dear singles if you have to lose track of who you are to fit in someone’s ideology, it’s not worth it and you won’t be happy. Do you. And do you the right way.

 Till next time God bless you!

Spoilt Tomatoes, Buyer Beware

 

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Normally when I shop for tomatoes I would go to the vegetable market, handpick the ones I want after scrutinizing them individually before I pay. If I pick one up that’s bad or show signs of rot, I would put it back in the pile. But there are times when I buy tomatoes in the supermarket and they are nicely packaged and wrapped in a size that’s very convenient to me.  No time to handpick, I  just grab and go.

Its time to cook and I reach in my refrigerator for the tomatoes that I bought at the supermarket nicely packaged only to fine that, they weren’t all that lovely as they were packaged in a way that the rotten parts were not revealed. Sounds familiar…..

It should be, if not with vegetables, with relationships. You meet someone and they are out of this world amazing only to find that they were only disguising their true rotten self. Often when you figure it out you have already made the purchase or have given of yourself something that you can’t take back, your effort, time, emotions etc. Yes it sucks, cause no one wants to get stuck with rotten tomatoes.

So this is what you do:

  1. Be very PATIENT in selecting your significant other.
  2. Scrutinize before you buy. Its better to find out the individuals fault before you commit to them. In doing this everyone is on the same page limiting the potential for relationship threatening surprises.
  3. Ask God to guide you in selecting, He won’t steer you wrong.
  4. And finally, be HONEST and true about yourself. If you don’t want to take home a rotten tomato, don’t be one.

God Bless J

Hearts In Storage

Been seeing too many people carrying their hurt around. Thought I’d reblog this!

Waiting For You

As it is on the dating scene, people move from mate to mate in pursuit of that special someone. As a result of this, some people get hurt. Some of this hurt takes years to be healed. Sometimes people don’t get over it but instead become bitter and harden not really letting others in.
While some can successfully move on after a breakup, forgiving and then entrusting their heart to someone else; others may give up on relationships all together while others continue having relationships not truly opening up their hearts to those they are with. We can see how the latter two can create problems. A relationship is a true connection of body, soul and spirit. Center to this connection is the heart. Heart has to be in it. However, a situation is created where people are in relationships and their hearts are just not available. Not available because someone broke it.

These…

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By whispersofhopeabm

Single Women have Protection

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Woke up to the sad news yesterday that yet another apartment on my complex was invaded by criminal elements who somehow have concocted a scheme that once there are no men living in an apartment then that’s their key. It brought me back to a few weeks ago when someone broke in our apartment while we were sleeping. Even though they left empty handed because an alarm was raised, it was a little disquieting to say the least. To an extent, it was as if this situation would cause a major disruption in my life as I had problems sleeping due to fear that the culprit would come back.

 I had to literally stop and anchor my faith in God, knowing that He was my Protector. Of course, people offered their opinion as to how our (My roommate and I) problem could be fixed. One of which was to “get a man.” It’s easy to go shack-up with any and anybody just to have that male presence to ward off the evils of the night. Yes it is. But because I am waiting on God’s will for me, I know he’ll be my protection until that day when I have my own husband to protect me.

 It should also be noted that God’s protection does not negate us being wise and taking precautions to ensure our safety. As single women, we have to protect ourselves from these individuals. Lock our doors and windows, get burglar bars, arm ourselves so that we have the ability to defend ourselves should the need arise. We must also be alert in our surroundings. Take note of the people you see every day. Most individuals who are targeted for robbery and or rape most times appear oblivious to the surrounding area being dangerous. Let’s be wise in all that we do, looking out for each other while making each day count.

 We don’t have to live in fear. We don’t have to have a spouse to be protected. We can live and enjoy our lives as God intended, Single or Married. Protect yourself!

Wrong Number

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I’m all for people being creative with technology, but deliberately calling someone you don’t know and then through pretense try to get a date is just crazy.

 

Have you ever had someone called your phone, only to find it’s a wrong number? Then the person on the other end tries to make a pass at you saying let’s get connected.

 

Yesterday after one of the most amazing church services I went home and saw two missed calls on my cell phone. I didn’t know the number but called it to see who was trying to reach me. A gentleman answered on the other end and he politely said I’m really sorry about that I think I dialed the wrong number. Moments after that, I received a text message from the same number: “You were not the girl I was trying to reach, but your voice sounds so sweet. Can we become phone friends?” I was immediately reminded of a movie I was watching with some college girls that did that to meet men who they eventually slept with or scammed for money. I also remembered being harassed by a particular young man after my cell network started offering free nights. I had to literally ignore all numbers that I didn’t know for him to stop calling me.

 

While this could be harmless (i.e. It was an accident) and end up in a meaningful relationship. It can also be dangerous. I also thought of the fact that many adventure seeking young people delve into the practice not taking into consideration that there are so many sex offenders at large. It is not wise to get caught up in this practice as a way of meeting people.

 

Yes you might be lonely, but try meeting others using safer means. It’s better to be single than to put your life in danger! Please let’s be wise!

 

Don’t Judge, ASK

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Over the past few weeks I saw how my expectation of others based on a projection of myself can cause me to be resentful. This is not just limited to a relationship, but upon evaluating me, it was found to be rampant in every aspect of my life.

I saw how selfish I was in that I expected others to carry out a requirement because it seems so easy to me. This lead me to think, we have to be careful about our expectations of others. Before we cast judgement, we must fully consider what the other individual’s circumstances, feelings and abilities dictate.

Take this simple scenario:

Jill started dating Neville two months ago. She is head over heels for him but really gets annoyed at the fact that earns well but drives a car that breaks down every 15 minutes. She often presses him to get a new car, because in her mind that is the sensible thing to do. She became so resentful of the fact that he has not heeded to her request that she started making subtle disrespectful comments regarding the same. This caused Neville to start questioning if this was the woman he wanted to be with. Unknown to Jill, was the fact that, even though Neville earned well, he had inherited a substantial amount of debt after his father passed and even though he is not living with his family He was the sole bread winner. As such he was maintaining two households. Even though Neville himself knew that he needed a car, this responsibility required him to prioritize  Also, not known to Jill was the fact that Neville was just about finished with paying off his father’s debt and His brother just finished his first degree and is seeking employment so that he can also contribute to the household.

I know, you are probably saying that Neville could have told her when she started pressing him to get a car. But it cannot be taken for granted that people most times only divulge what they are comfortable divulging. Women especially need to understand that the men in their lives are not idiots and there is reasoning behind what they do. Let’s not take on judgmental tones but seek to understand why the people in our lives take certain stances.

It’s not enough that it makes sense to you, but does it make sense to the other person? Instead of dictating calmly ask why in an undemanding tone. It will work wonders in your relationships.

Online Dating for Women

Many women shy away from online dating because it seems to go against the traditional believe that it is the man that should find a wife. Would you practice or consider online dating?

By whispersofhopeabm

Making Love Transitions

… And then you meet someone who seems to be all you ever daydream about. In the midst of the excitement, are the questions of uncertainty with what will happen next. Well these three things can help settle your mind.

Commitment

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You need to know that you can trust this individual with being faithful to you. The coming together of two people also means the leaving behind of other things. Some of this requires careful planning because it may require leaving family, friends, employment, homes and whole long list. It is not wise to take these decisions without being committed in that relationship. So one of the first things that should happen before any such decision takes place; is actually being engaged. An engagement officially declares that we are planning to spend the rest of our lives together. It is a official commitement. It also causes the individual to be accountable to you and others for upholding the relationship.

Accountability

Once you are committed to each other. You each have a responsibility to build and direct your relationship. Accountability is very important in ensuring that even though you are not married there is a support system that will ensure that you do. Accountability involves other individuals who help in making the transition seamless. These individuals include but are not limited to pastors, marriage counsellors, parents and close friends. They help to guide you especially in difficult moments. Accountability is very important; imagine taking a decision to leave your employment and home and then the other person changes their mind. That could be devastating.

Future Security

After being committed and accountable to each other, there needs to be some level of comfort as to what the future will be.  Where will we live? Will there be sufficient income? Will I be worse off than I was before I got married? These will be especially important to the individual who will have to leave most behind.

If these three areas are resolved it begs for a good start to marriage bliss. But I will advise that if there is no commitment, one need not to worry their brain about what it is that will happen. Enjoy each day rather than stress about it. Once you become committed deal with the questions as they arise. Remember to enjoy every day, make note of them, they will be fund memories to review later on in life.